AGM produces dramatic twist and turns


....or not, but then you were never going to click a link that said "AGM as dull as ditch water" were you. The traditional warm up to Shakey's (I'm the webmaster and I'll bloody well decide if there's an e in it) quiz, was attended by a die hard crew (excluding the 1st team captain who was rewarding his myriad of staff (Jamie) for their dedication throughout the year), and included all the usual constitutional stuff, but was most noticeable for an acute onset of paranoia by the outgoing and simultaneously incoming Chair. 

Having given his usual fire and brimstone speech about the eternal damnation awaiting those who were more than 20 minutes late with their subs, he then went on to describe a dastardly plot he had uncovered by some Machiavellian Trotskyites, to take over the club from under our noses. Seemingly, said Bolshevik revolutionaries have hatched a long term strategy involving the production of children as long as 14 years ago, who were surreptitiously infiltrated into the club as sleepers, to be activated when we least expect it. He declared a state of Marshall law and proposed that the cricket committee (who knew we had a cricket committee?) vote itself draconian new powers at its next meeting. It was unanimously agreed by the floor that the time when we would least expect such a thing to happen was equally now and never and that the Chair needed to give up giving up drinking.

With a resigned sigh, he moved onto the next item on the agenda, which was his annual rant regarding the death of Sunday cricket and the apparent indifference of the lazy $@8(£^%8 that called themselves cricketers to do anything about it. Just as he was about to hit fever pitch, the cricket committee (again?) announced that the currently ranked first equal world's grumpiest Scotsman had decided to split the Celtic alliance that had guided the 2nds to promotion and take over the leadership of a Sunday side. Furthermore, the self same cricket committee (who are these people?), had tabled a number of items for their next meeting regarding player availability, fixture priority and integration (or otherwise) with existing Sunday commitments.

Somewhat deflated, he then pulled his trump card out. Had we actually been promoted? Because it's a well established fact that the league are out to get us. The whole committee is populated by Machiavellian, Trotskyite, Bolshevik Bledlow Ridge haters and ...... at which point the cricket committee (you're making this up!!!) reported that the Secretary had received a letter from some very nice people at the League, confirming our promotion.

The Chair at this point gave up, ordered a beer and went and bought everyone fish and chips.

On the dull, but necessary side, the club is liquid due to a fabulous year behind the bar, and has a full complement of officers, with Dave Bird taking over the 2nd team vice captaincy from Doug McIndoe as he sets off on his Sunday adventure. The committee remains unchanged other than this, apart from the appointment of John Rolfe as chairman of the cricket committee ( Ahhhhhh). But you must not divulge this information to anyone, cos if Pam finds out, all hell will break loose!!